1671 in England

• Monarch – Charles II

File:Colonel Blood Stealing the Crown Jewels.png by Henry Perronet Briggs]]

• February – Nell Gwyn retires from the stage and moves into a brick townhouse at 79 Pall Mall, London.{{cite book|editor=Sheppard, F. H. W.|chapter=No. 79 Pall Mall: Nell Gwynne's house|series=Survey of London vol. 29–30|title=St James Westminster, Pt 1|pages=377–378|url=http://www.british-history.ac.uk/report.asp?compid=40600|year=1960|accessdate=2013-07-12}}
• 13 March – The Parliament of England addresses the King against the growth of popery.{{cite book|editor=Moody, T. W.|title=A New History of Ireland. 8: A Chronology of Irish History|publisher=Oxford University Press|year=1989|isbn=978-0-19-821744-2|display-editors=etal}}
• 22 March – The Sabine baronetcy is created for John Sabine.
• 31 March – The Royal Navy launches 102-gun HMS Royal James at Portsmouth Royal Dockyard, its first warship to have a frame reinforced by iron bars rather than an all wooden ship, an innovation by naval architect Anthony Deane.
• c. 23 April – First record of ice cream being served in England, to the King at Windsor.Recorded by Elias Ashmole in 1672. {{Cite book|last=Davidson|first=Alan|author-link=Alan Davidson (food writer)|title-link=The Oxford Companion to Food|title=The Oxford Companion to Food|year=2014|editor=Jaine, Tom|isbn=978-0-19-967733-7|edition=3rd|publisher=Oxford University Press|oclc=890807357|page=403}}
• 9 May – Thomas Blood, disguised as a clergyman, attempts to steal the Crown Jewels from the Tower of London.{{cite book|title=Penguin Pocket On This Day|publisher=Penguin Reference Library|isbn=0-14-102715-0|year=2006}} He is immediately caught because he is too drunk to run with the loot. He is later condemned to death and then pardoned and exiled by King Charles II.
• 6 September – The Royal Court dispatches a letter to the "King of Formosa" (Zheng Jing, ruler of the Kingdom of Tungning) confirming that English ships will be welcome to trade at the "City of Tywan" (Taipei on the island of Taiwan).
• 9 November – The Duke of York's Theatre is opened at Dorset Garden in London by the players of the Duke's Company.{{cite book|editor1=Carter, Tim|editor2=Butt, John|title=Cambridge History of Seventeenth-Century Music|year=2005|publisher=Cambridge University Press|isbn=978-0-521-79273-8|chapter=Chronology|author=Rose, Stephen|chapter-url=https://books.google.com/books?id=mHJvKVq0vXoC&pg=PA533}}
• Late – French lady-in-waiting Louise de Kérouaille becomes a mistress to the King.{{cite book|authorlink=Jenny Uglow|first=Jenny|last=Uglow|title=A Gambling Man|location=London|publisher=Faber|year=2010|orig-year=2009|isbn=978-0-571-21734-2|page=509}}

• John Milton's epic poem Paradise Regained.{{cite book|last=Palmer|first=Alan|last2=Palmer|first2=Veronica|year=1992|title=The Chronology of British History|publisher=Century Ltd|location=London|pages=191–192|isbn=0-7126-5616-2}}

• 26 February – Anthony Ashley-Cooper, 3rd Earl of Shaftesbury, English politician and philosopher (died 1713)
• 6 November – Colley Cibber, poet laureate, playwright and actor-manager (died 1757)
• 15 November (bapt.) – Anne Bracegirdle, actress (died 1748)

• 31 March – Anne Hyde, wife of the future James II of England (born 1637)
• 5 May – Edward Montagu, 2nd Earl of Manchester, politician (born 1602)
• 14 July – Méric Casaubon, classical scholar (born 1599)
• 26 October – Sir John Gell, 1st Baronet, politician (born 1593)
• 12 November – Thomas Fairfax, 3rd Lord Fairfax of Cameron, Civil War general (born 1612)

{{Reflist}}

{{England year nav}}

{{Year in Europe|1671}}

Category:Years of the 17th century in England