Conflict avoidance

Conflicts are inevitable and not always the result of malintent or other underlying problems.{{Cite news |date=2018-01-03 |title=Why We Should Be Disagreeing More at Work |url=https://hbr.org/2018/01/why-we-should-be-disagreeing-more-at-work |access-date=2025-01-28 |work=Harvard Business Review |language=en |issn=0017-8012}} Avoiding all conflict is impossible.{{Cite web |title=Conflict is unavoidable. Suffering is optional. {{!}} Psychology Today |url=https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/locus-of-control/201006/conflict-is-unavoidable-suffering-is-optional |access-date=2025-01-28 |website=www.psychologytoday.com |language=en-US}} For example, a person may experience a conflict because they want to attend two different events at the same time. Conflicts also arise when the legitimate needs or desires of two people or groups do not coincide.{{Cite book |last=Ayoko |first=Oluremi B. |url=https://www.google.com/books/edition/Handbook_of_Conflict_Management_Research/UUcjBAAAQBAJ?hl=en&gbpv=1&pg=PA34 |title=Handbook of Conflict Management Research |last2=Ashkanasy |first2=Neal M. |last3=Jehn |first3=Karen A. |date=2014-07-31 |publisher=Edward Elgar Publishing |isbn=978-1-78100-694-8 |pages=34–35 |language=en}} For example, people need sleep when they are sick, but parents may find that their need for sleep is in conflict with their need to care for an equally ill child. They may have opposing interests (e.g., the parent's interest in sleep versus the child's interest in having the parent awake) or incompatible actions (e.g., the parent cannot sleep because the child is crying).

Conflict management is the process of responding to a conflict; its goal is a satisfactory resolution of the conflict.{{Citation |last=Ronquillo |first=Yasmyne |title=Conflict Management |date=2025 |work=StatPearls |url=https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK470432/ |access-date=2025-01-28 |place=Treasure Island (FL) |publisher=StatPearls Publishing |pmid=29262184 |last2=Ellis |first2=Vickie L. |last3=Toney-Butler |first3=Tammy J.}} Conflict resolution is finding ways to resolve the conflict. For example, the person could decide which event to attend, or the parent could ask someone else to help the sick child.

A conflict management style is the habitual way that a person responds to conflict. In the Thomas-Kilman model, there are five styles, of which avoidance is one. For example, if the person invited to two events has an avoidant style, they might procrastinate on deciding which event to attend until it is too late to attend either of them.

Early research in conflict management focused on effective ways to actively manage conflict within the organizational setting. This line of research was largely inspired by the Management Grid introduced by theoreticians Robert R. Blake and Jane Mouton as well as Morton Deustch's Theory of Cooperation and Competition. In the 1970s and 80s, various management scholars redeveloped these models, renaming the various dimensions and developing self-report scales to measure individual conflict management styles. One of the most popular versions to come out of this research was the Dual Concerns Model introduced by Pruitt & Rubin (1986) to predict behavior in negotiations. They labeled the two dimensions: concern for self and concern for others. The avoidance conflict style is marked by a low concern for self and low concern for their negotiation partner.{{Cite journal |last1=De Dreu |first1=Carsten K. W. |last2=Evers |first2=Arne |last3=Beersma |first3=Bianca |last4=Kluwer |first4=Esther S. |last5=Nauta |first5=Aukje |date=2001 |title=A theory-based measure of conflict management strategies in the workplace |url=https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/job.107 |journal=Journal of Organizational Behavior |language=en |volume=22 |issue=6 |pages=645–668 |doi=10.1002/job.107 |issn=0894-3796}} While the specific labels for each dimension and conflict styles vary across different models, avoidance is generally considered a passive, lose-lose approach.{{Cite book |last1=Roloff |first1=Michael E. |title=The International Encyclopedia of Interpersonal Communication |last2=Liu |first2=Esther |date=2016 |publisher=Wiley Blackwell |isbn=978-1-118-30605-5 |editor-last=Berger |editor-first=Charles R. |series=The Wiley Blackwell-ICA international encyclopedias of communication |location=Hoboken |pages=1–9 |doi=10.1002/9781118540190.wbeic020 |editor-last2=Roloff |editor-first2=Michael E. |editor-last3=Wilson |editor-first3=Steve R. |editor-last4=Solomon |editor-first4=Denise}}

Conflict avoidance is often rooted in early socialization and personality traits that influence individuals' perception of potential harms or opportunities. According to communication scholar Michael Roloff, individuals often seek to create and maintain a state of interpersonal harmony in their relationships, which is defined by consensus about most issues. The existence of conflict threatens harmony, and some individuals report that they generally wish to avoid conflict. For example, some individuals have a low tolerance for disagreement, tend to take conflict personally, and believe that conflict is always destructive. Research has found that conflict avoidance is positively associated with agreeableness and neuroticism.{{Cite journal |last1=Tehrani |first1=Hossein Dabiriyan |last2=Yamini |first2=Sara |date=2020-04-15 |title=Personality traits and conflict resolution styles: A meta-analysis |url=https://linkinghub.elsevier.com/retrieve/pii/S0191886919307330 |journal=Personality and Individual Differences |volume=157 |pages=109794 |doi=10.1016/j.paid.2019.109794 |issn=0191-8869|url-access=subscription }} One study of 350 undergraduates and 100 managers discovered that personality traits, as measured by the Big Five, accounted for 20% of the variance in avoidant conflict style.{{Cite journal |last=Antonioni |first=David |date=1998-01-01 |title=Relationship Between the Big Five Personality Factors and Conflict Management Styles |url=https://www.emerald.com/insight/content/doi/10.1108/eb022814/full/html |journal=International Journal of Conflict Management |volume=9 |issue=4 |pages=336–355 |doi=10.1108/eb022814 |issn=1044-4068|url-access=subscription }}

According to Stella Ting-Toomey's Face Negotiation Theory, avoidant behavior may also be motivated by face concerns, defined as the self-image an individual has in social interactions. This theory is used by cross-cultural researchers to explain how people from different cultures interpret and react to conflict. For example, in collective societies, there is more of a sensitivity to hierarchy compared to the West, leading to greater avoidance when there is significant separation between the parties involved.{{Cite journal |last1=Friedman |first1=Ray |last2=Chi |first2=Shu-Cheng |last3=Liu |first3=Leigh Anne |date=2006-01-01 |title=An expectancy model of Chinese–American differences in conflict-avoiding |url=https://doi.org/10.1057/palgrave.jibs.8400172 |journal=Journal of International Business Studies |language=en |volume=37 |issue=1 |pages=76–91 |doi=10.1057/palgrave.jibs.8400172 |issn=1478-6990}} In collective societies, there are also greater relationship-oriented values and a belief that a direct approach will harm a relationship, causing a greater prevalence of conflict avoidance.{{Cite journal |last1=Chunyan Peng |first1=Ann |last2=Tjosvold |first2=Dean |date=2011 |title=Social face concerns and conflict avoidance of Chinese employees with their Western or Chinese managers |url=http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0018726711400927 |journal=Human Relations |language=en |volume=64 |issue=8 |pages=1031–1050 |doi=10.1177/0018726711400927 |issn=0018-7267|url-access=subscription }} Generally, individuals from collectivist societies are more likely to avoid conflict compared to individuals from individualistic societies.{{Cite journal |last=Leung |first=Kwok |date=1988 |title=Some Determinants of Conflict Avoidance |url=http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0022002188019001009 |journal=Journal of Cross-Cultural Psychology |language=en |volume=19 |issue=1 |pages=125–136 |doi=10.1177/0022002188019001009 |issn=0022-0221|url-access=subscription }}

Research within conflict avoidance psychology has identified three areas that are significantly impacted by an individual's choices surrounding conflict: stress, loneliness, and relationship satisfaction.{{Cite journal |last1=Bruce |first1=Madeline J. |last2=Chang |first2=Alexander |last3=Evans |first3=Luke |last4=Streb |first4=Madison |last5=Dehon |first5=Jewell |last6=Handal |first6=Paul J. |date=2022-12-15 |title=Relationship of Conflict, Conflict Avoidance, and Conflict Resolution to Psychological Adjustment |url=http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/00332941221146708 |journal=Psychological Reports |language=en |volume=127 |issue=5 |pages=2324–2333 |doi=10.1177/00332941221146708 |issn=0033-2941 |pmid=36520593|url-access=subscription }} According to communication scholar Michael Roloff, the general sentiment is that leaving conflicts unresolved and unaddressed causes interpersonal issues to fester, resulting in either explosive confrontation or crippling emotional suppression. However, empirical research has found mixed results, associating conflict avoidance with both positive and negative outcomes.

Partners in long-term relationships often "pick their battles" and withhold complaints to manage conflict. However, withdrawing from conflict has been associated with higher rates of divorce and lower relationship quality. According to communication scholars Caughlin & Scott, explicit avoidance is far more damaging than implicit or tacit avoidance.

Conflict avoidance is just as prevalent within stable marriages as in unstable ones. Overall, the effect of conflict avoidance may depend on the interpretation of the behavior rather than the behavior itself.{{Cite book |last1=Roloff |first1=Michael E. |title=The International Encyclopedia of Interpersonal Communication |last2=Liu |first2=Esther |date=2016 |publisher=Wiley Blackwell |isbn=978-1-118-30605-5 |editor-last=Berger |editor-first=Charles R. |series=The Wiley Blackwell-ICA international encyclopedias of communication |location=Hoboken |pages=1–9 |chapter=Conflict Avoidance |doi=10.1002/9781118540190.wbeic020 |editor-last2=Roloff |editor-first2=Michael E. |editor-last3=Wilson |editor-first3=Steve R. |editor-last4=Solomon |editor-first4=Denise}}

Conflict in families can serve an important function, supporting child development through individuation and communicating the specific needs of individual family members. When conflicts are avoided, individuals may perceive their family as unresponsive or indifferent to their needs, which increases frustration and hostility. Conflict avoidance has been associated with poor outcomes for children, including loneliness and maladjustment.{{Citation |last1=Koerner |first1=Ascan F. |title=Family Conflict Communication |date=2006 |work=The SAGE Handbook of Conflict Communication: Integrating Theory, Research, and Practice |pages=159–184 |url=https://sk.sagepub.com/reference/hdbk_conflictcomm/n6.xml |access-date=2024-11-24 |place=2455 Teller Road, Thousand Oaks California 91320 United States |publisher=SAGE Publications, Inc. |doi=10.4135/9781412976176.n6 |isbn=978-0-7619-3045-7 |last2=Fitzpatrick |first2=Mary Anne|url-access=subscription }}{{Citation |last1=Caughlin |first1=John P. |title=Conflict Avoidance in Families |date=2012-01-20 |work=The Wiley-Blackwell Handbook of Couples and Family Relationships |pages=113–128 |editor-last=Noller |editor-first=Patricia |url=https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/9781444354119.ch8 |access-date=2024-11-24 |edition=1 |publisher=Wiley |language=en |doi=10.1002/9781444354119.ch8 |isbn=978-1-4443-3450-0 |last2=Hardesty |first2=Jennifer L. |last3=Middleton |first3=Ashley V. |editor2-last=Karantzas |editor2-first=Gery C.|url-access=subscription }}

Conflict avoidance can result in family estrangement, as a person may break off the relationship to avoid dealing with the messy reality of other people having conflicting needs and desires.{{Cite web |last=Volpe |first=Allie |date=2025-01-15 |title=“Protecting your peace” can kill your friendships |url=https://www.vox.com/even-better/390576/protecting-your-peace-relationships-conflict-avoidance-individualism |access-date=2025-01-28 |website=Vox |language=en-US}} A pattern of conflict avoidance can result in social isolation and not learning the skills to manage emotions.

Conflict avoidance has received considerably less study and attention compared to active conflict management behaviors such as mediation or integrative negotiation. This is partly due to the difficulty of studying unobservable behaviors such as "not engaging" or "avoiding" conflict.{{Cite journal |last1=Hample |first1=Dale |last2=Hample |first2=Jessica Marie |date=2019-11-11 |title=There is No Away: Where Do People Go When They Avoid an Interpersonal Conflict? |url=https://ncmr.lps.library.cmu.edu/article/id/368/ |journal=Negotiation and Conflict Management Research |volume=13 |issue=4 |doi=10.34891/fy30-0198 |issn=1750-4716}} In the workplace, avoiding conflict often leads to emotional suppression and feelings of powerlessness, which can increase stress, burnout, and fatigue. From a productivity perspective, conflict avoidance is negatively related to information exchange and team cohesiveness. Unresolved conflict in the workplace has been linked to miscommunication resulting from confusion or refusal to cooperate, increased stress, reduced creative collaboration and team problem-solving, and distrust.[http://www.seattlepi.com/business/337162_workcoach29.html Workplace Coach: Companies pay the price when managers avoid dealing with conflict], Maureen, Moriarty, Seattlepi, Oct. 28, 2007. However, this negative effect depends on the quality of workplace relationships; in generally positive relationships, avoiding conflict can be associated with higher productivity.

There are two main approaches to studying conflict avoidance in academic research: self-report scales and behavioral observation. Several instruments have been developed to measure conflict management styles based on the dual-concerns model and are listed below:

Experts suggest that management should not wait for formal complaints to take action and should establish unrelated complaint networks such as counselors to provide a more effective outlet for avoiding employee distress.{{Cite journal |last1=Cortina |first1=Lilia M. |last2=Magley |first2=Vicki J. |date=2009 |title=Patterns and profiles of response to incivility in the workplace. |url=https://doi.apa.org/doi/10.1037/a0014934 |journal=Journal of Occupational Health Psychology |language=en |volume=14 |issue=3 |pages=272–288 |doi=10.1037/a0014934 |issn=1939-1307 |pmid=19586222|url-access=subscription }} Managers should also develop strong cooperative goals and proactively train employees in conflict management which promotes more constructive conflict management.{{Cite journal |last1=Tjosvold |first1=Deon |last2=Sun |first2=Haifa F. |date=2002-01-01 |title=Understanding Conflict Avoidance: Relationship, Motivations, Actions, and Consequences |url=https://doi.org/10.1108/eb022872 |journal=International Journal of Conflict Management |volume=13 |issue=2 |pages=142–164 |doi=10.1108/eb022872 |issn=1044-4068|url-access=subscription }}

• Organizational conflict
• Conflict management
• Conflict management style
• Interpersonal relationship

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Category:Conflict (process)