User:Jessemckay

I am not a smart-ass. I am just surrounded by dumb-asses.

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I admit it. I always have to know what's going on in the world around me.

I do not pledge allegiance to the planet on which I stand.

I am an American and I have the long-form birth certificate.

I am a natural-born citizen and I'm over 35.

I can believe that it's not butter.

I don't want "hope and change." I want results and smaller government and if these dopes have to spend a trillion dollars, I want the biggest, best border fence on the whole darn planet. If I have to buy an eco-friendly vehicle that runs on sunshine and rainbows, well then, I want to drive a big super-cab truck that goes a hundred miles an hour and I want to haul a boat behind me while I'm doing it.

Barack Obama is not "change you can believe in." He is not a different Democrat. He is simply the single biggest advocate for expanded, empowered government in our time. Hey Barack, I can't believe it's not B.S.

A trillion dollar tax hike is impeachable on its face, because obviously government is both engaging in public theft and wasting the proceeds. A trillion dollar spending bill without a tax hike isn't just impeachable, it is a tremendous theft from the next generation. Grand, grand, grand, grand theft.

We've had three slices of the trillion-dollar Obama pie. It's time to put down the fork and call for the check.

Did you miss me? Did you miss me like you miss a friend, or did you miss me like, you threw a rock at me but you missed me?

Don't take a lesson from a moron.

Nothing is too simple. There's always someone out there who's even simpler.

The Democrats tend to win elections when they run a closeted left-winger who is a complete unknown outside of his home state (Jimmy Carter, Bill Clinton, Barack Obama.)

The Republicans tend to win elections when they run a conservative who has served as the governor of a major state (Ronald Reagan, George W. Bush) or the (moderate but hawkish) sitting Vice-President (Richard Nixon, George H.W. Bush.)

When the Democrats want to lose an election, they put up a clueless Yankee liberal who has worked in government for his whole life (John Kerry, Walter Mondale, George McGovern.)

When the Republicans want to lose an election, they run a tired, old war hero with moderate views who has been sitting in the Senate for about a million years (Bob Dole, John McCain).

When the independents want to lose an election, they run Ralph Nader.