User:Neocapitalist/How to pick your nose

surlethe: chardok, i need your help

chardok1: I'm listyening.

chardok1: listening

surlethe: my nose is stuffed

surlethe: and i'm having trouble picking it

chardok1: okay.

surlethe: thus, i request your guidance, as a nosepicking master

chardok1: I can do that.

surlethe: how do i pick my nose well?

chardok1: first, which finger do you use?

surlethe: usually the forefinger

chardok1: stop that.

chardok1: use your pinky. Must better penetration

chardok1: must=much

chardok1: okay.

chardok1: Now, there are two method which work well for clearing the

nasal passages of obstructions

chardok1: MEthod one, which I like to call the sweep and clear.

chardok1: you simply move your pinky about inside the nose, sweeping away

the offending boogers.

chardok1: MEthod #2 I call the lockon.

chardok1: that's where you have identified an obstruction which does not

respond to method #1

chardok1: youdry your pinky off.

chardok1: make SURE the pinky is dry

chardok1: your nose should be running ever so slightly from the

irritation of the sweep and clear.

chardok1: you find the offending booger with your pinky, then, you "lock

on" to it. by pressing against it.

chardok1: and hold it for about 30 seconds or so (Longer if you feel the

grrip isn't quite there.

chardok1: Then, quickly remove your finger from your nose, the offending

booger should be firmly attached to your pinky.

chardok1: if it still does not respond after two or three tries, let it

be for awhile. The slight running nose you now no doubt have will stop,

but it will tend to build up onto the booger you were trying to remove,

which will give you a much

chardok1: NOW. after attempt #2, if the booger is still firmly

entrenched, plug up one nostril, and BLOW HARD.

chardok1: clearing mucual is a little tougher.

chardok1: This is the only time I will recommend drugs.

chardok1: Sudafed PE works wee.

chardok1: also, for temporary relief, rapid, pressurized evacuation of

the one nostril and NOT the other, will work

elheru07: i discover that blowing in the shower helps well

elheru07: the steam and all

chardok1: I am a big fan of the coaches kleenex.

elheru07: jam one nostril shut with a finger, blow HARD, and repeat with

the other

chardok1: midway through the shower, give each nostril a good blast.

elheru07: if the blockage is particularly irritating, do it again and

then pick

Nerd359: External preasure works well in closing one nostril at a time

surlethe: excellent

surlethe: this is most useful

chardok1: thank you for visiting Chardok's institute of homeopathic nasal

decongestion

surlethe: thank you all very much, and you especially, Chardok, master

nosepicker

Much thanks to Chardok, master of nosepicking