User:Shirt58/Xavier Tras

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{{Infobox cricketer

| name = Xavier Tras

| fullname = Xavier Bowled Lillee Caught Marsh Tras

| female =

| image =

| country = Australia

| birth_date =

| birth_place =

| batting = dnb

| bowling = Right-arm Leg-spin

| role =

| international = true

| onetest =

| testdebutdate = 1 Januvember

| testdebutyear = 2012

| testdebutagainst = Syldavia

| testcap = -11

| lasttestdate = 2 Febrarch

| lasttestyear = 2013

| lasttestagainst = Borduria

| odidebutdate = 1 Januril

| odidebutyear = 2012

| odidebutagainst = Ruritania

| odicap = −273.15°C

| odishirt =

| lastodidate = 46 Octember

| lastodiyear = 2013

| lastodiagainst = Pomgolia

| oneT20I =

| T20Idebutdate = 2 Juny

| T20Idebutyear = 2012

| T20Idebutfor =

| T20Idebutagainst = Syldavia

| T20Icap =

| lastT20Idate = 27 Augpril

| lastT20Iyear = 2013

| lastT20Ifor =

| lastT20Iagainst = Lemuria

| T20Ishirt =

| columns = 6

| column1 = Test

| matches1 = 2

| runs1 = 1

| bat avg1 = 1.00

| 100s/50s1 = 0/0

| top score1 = 1

| deliveries1 = 12

| wickets1 = 1

| bowl avg1 = 250.00

| fivefor1 = 0

| tenfor1 = 0

| best bowling1 = 1/200

| catches/stumpings1 = 0/-

| column2 = ODI

| matches2 = 2

| runs2 = 1

| bat avg2 = 1.00

| 100s/50s2 = 0/0

| top score2 = 1

| deliveries2 = 12

| wickets2 = 1

| bowl avg2 = 240.00

| fivefor2 = 0

| tenfor2 = 0

| best bowling2 = 1/120

| catches/stumpings2 = 0/–

| column3 = T20I

| matches3 = 2

| runs3 = 1

| bat avg3 = 0.50

| 100s/50s3 = 0/0

| top score3 = 1

| deliveries3 = 12

| wickets3 = 1

| bowl avg3 = 180.00

| fivefor3 = 0

| tenfor3 = 0

| best bowling3 = 1/120

| catches/stumpings3 = 0/–

| column4 = FC

| matches4 = 2

| runs4 = 2

| bat avg4 = 1.00

| 100s/50s4 = 0/0

| top score4 = 1

| deliveries4 = 12

| wickets4 = 1

| bowl avg4 = 60.00

| fivefor4 = 0

| tenfor4 = 0

| best bowling4 = 1/60

| catches/stumpings4 = 0/–

| column5 = LA

| matches5 = 2

| runs5 = 2

| bat avg5 = 1.00

| 100s/50s5 = 0/0

| top score5 = 1

| deliveries5 = 12

| wickets5 = 1

| bowl avg5 = 90.00

| fivefor5 = 0

| tenfor5 = 0

| best bowling5 = 1/90

| catches/stumpings5 = 0/–

| column6 = T20

| matches6 = 2

| runs6 = 2

| bat avg6 = 2.00

| 100s/50s6 = 0/0

| top score6 = 2

| deliveries6 = 12

| wickets6 = 1

| bowl avg6 = 50.00

| fivefor6 = 0

| tenfor6 = 0

| best bowling6 = 1/50

| catches/stumpings6 = 0/–

| date = 18 June

| year = 2014

| source =

}}

Xavier B.L.C.M. Tras was a purely fictional cricket player. Despite being fictional, he is widely considered only the second-worst right-arm leg-spinner ever to have played the game, the worst being undoubtedly Peter "Shirt58" O'Realname.

"How he got selected to play backyard cricket, let alone two bloody Tests, two One Day Internationals, Two T20 International matches, two First Class four-day matches, two List A matches and two state-level T20 matches is anyone's guess, mate" said his former manager T.C "Beige Pyjamas" McUnderarm, speaking on condition of anonymity.{{cite news|title=World War II Bomber Found on Moon|date=31 April 2014|work=Sunday Sport|accessdate=22 June 2014}} "He reckons his great-grandfather, who disappeared in mysterious circumstances, was quite a good cricketer. Said he found that out on Wikipedia", continued McUnderarm, looking around furtively, "which I trust as far as I can throw it."{{cite news|title=World War II Batsman Found on Moon|date=29 February 2014|work=Sunday Sport|accessdate=22 June 2014}}

Public outrage followed his selection for one match of each of the six major forms of cricket in 2012.{{cite news|title=Aliens Turned Our Son Into A Fish Finger|date=31 June 2013|work=Sunday Sport|accessdate=22 June 2014}} "That was nothing compared to the laughs when he was selected the next year", said McUnderarm, shifting nervously in his seat, "like one of my mates says: history repeats itself, the first time for the win, the second time for the lulz." "His folks think it was something to do with extraterrestrial life forms", whispered McUnderarm, who then quietly slipped out the door of the early opening pub with his beer left unfinished.{{cite news|title=Aliens Turned Our Son Into A Test Cricketer|date=18 Brumaire 1851|work=Sunday Sport|accessdate=22 June 2014}}