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Talk:Ched Evans/GA1

GA Review

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{{al|{{#titleparts:Ched Evans/GA1|-1}}|noname=yes}}
:This review is transcluded from Talk:Ched Evans/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: GreatOrangePumpkin (talk · contribs) 19:59, 31 July 2012 (UTC)

:GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)

  1. It is reasonably well written.
  2. :a (prose): {{GAList/check|aye}} b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists): {{GAList/check|aye}}
  3. :: " After an unspectacular first two seasons at Bramall Lane he scored 35 goals during the 2011–12 season." - Confusing. Is the 2011-12 season = the two seasons? Or is it something different?
  4. :::That is the standard way of referring to seasons. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
  5. :: "With first choice opportunities at City limited Evans moved on loan to Norwich City in November of that year, " - I don't understand the first phrase.
  6. :::Changed choice to team. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
  7. :: Who are the "Canaries"?
  8. :::Norwich City, have swapped to Norwich. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
  9. :: "and just just"
  10. :::Removed the second one.Bladeboy1889 (talk)
  11. :: "Evans returned to Manchester City after his initial loan deal expired in January 2008 having made eight appearances and scored two goals.[9]" there should be a comma between the date and "having"
  12. ::: added a comma
  13. :: "with Manchester City able to" - shouldn't it be "with Manchester City being able to..."?
  14. :: "Evans joined Sheffield United for an initial fee of £3 million plus possible future add-ons on a three year deal in July 2009[15] making his debut for United in the first game of the new season; " - such a long sentence and no commas... but there should be one ahead the footnote
  15. :::Comma added Bladeboy1889 (talk)
  16. :: I am not a native English speaker, but I feel there are many commas missing. I will request a second opinion and I suggest you find someone who could copyedit this article.
  17. :: " He become a regular member of the squad and in November 2007" surely it should be "became"? Or is he still playing for Wales?
  18. :::Typo - changed to became. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
  19. :: "On 28 March 2012 Stuart Pearce the Great Britain Olympic football team manager was present at the match against Chesterfield with Ched Evans scoring a hat-trick and scoring his thirtieth goal of the season in a 4–1 at Bramall Lane. " - "On 28 March 2012, Stuart Pearce the Great Britain Olympic football team manager, was present at the match against Chesterfield, with Ched Evans scoring a hat-trick and scoring his thirtieth goal of the season in a 4–1 at Bramall Lane. " Also it could be reworded as the "with...+ing" is rather colloquial, and last scoring should be removed.
  20. :::Removed the second scoring and revised the sentence slightly. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
  21. :: "Evans stated about the possibility of representing Team GB at the London 2012 Summer Olympics," - update?
  22. :::I've reworded it slightly. Not sure what you mean by update? He is in prison so certainly hasn't been to the Olympics. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
  23. :::: Oops... Perhaps I did this mistake as I reviewed step by step...--Kürbis (✔) 13:32, 10 August 2012 (UTC)
  24. :: "After the death of former Wales boss and Sheffield United player, coach and Manager" - why is manager in capitals while coach is not?
  25. :::Changed. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
  26. :: "Evans revealed a message under his shirt after scoring his first goal in the FA Cup win over Torquay United which read:" - comma ahead which, and read - reads
  27. :::comma added - read (pronounced red) is the past tense of read so that is correct. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
  28. ::::My mistake. I did not read it carefully. Regards.--Kürbis (✔) 13:32, 10 August 2012 (UTC)
  29. :: These are the major issues. The text may need a slight copyedit, but all in all it is ok for GA. Regards.--Kürbis (✔) 13:26, 8 August 2012 (UTC)
  30. :::Updated the text accordingly. Bladeboy1889 (talk) 12:24, 10 August 2012 (UTC)
  31. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
  32. :a (references): {{GAList/check|aye}} b (citations to reliable sources): {{GAList/check|aye}} c (OR): {{GAList/check|aye}}
  33. ::
  34. It is broad in its coverage.
  35. :a (major aspects): {{GAList/check|aye}} b (focused): {{GAList/check|aye}}
  36. ::
  37. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
  38. :Fair representation without bias: {{GAList/check|aye}}
  39. ::
  40. It is stable.
  41. :No edit wars, etc.: {{GAList/check|aye}}
  42. ::
  43. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
  44. :a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): {{GAList/check|aye}} b (appropriate use with suitable captions): {{GAList/check|aye}}
  45. ::
  46. Overall:
  47. :Pass/Fail: {{GAList/check|pass}}
  48. ::
  • Nevermind, I may finish today. Regards.--Kürbis (✔) 08:19, 8 August 2012 (UTC)

:Pass Meets the criteria. --Kürbis (✔) 13:32, 10 August 2012 (UTC)