Talk:Wood/Water/GA1

GA Review

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{{al|{{#titleparts:Wood/Water/GA1|-1}}|noname=yes}}
:This review is transcluded from Talk:Wood/Water/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 18:12, 21 October 2020 (UTC)

{{GAProgress | prose =y | mos =y | reflayout =y | reliablesources =y | originalresearch =y | copyvio =y | broadness =y | focus =y | neutral =y | stable =y | freeortaggedpics =y | picsrelevant =y }}

Starting on another one for you soon --K. Peake 18:12, 21 October 2020 (UTC)

=Infobox and lead=

  • Mid-to-late 2001 → 2001
  • Separate studios in the infobox by using flatlist instead
  • "on the record label Anti- on" → "by Anti- on"
  • "of third studio album" → "of their third studio album,"
  • "for the remainder of the year." → "for the remainder of 2000."
  • Are you sure the track wasn't recorded with Robert Carranza?
  • Target Milwaukee, Wisconsin to Milwaukee
  • "Wood/Water moved away from" → "The album moved away from"
  • "was met with a generally favorable response from" → "received generally favorable reviews from"
  • "the band could promote the album," → "the band promoted it,"
  • "embarked on a US tour," → "embarked on an accompanying US tour,"
  • "was released as the lead single" → "was released as the album's lead single"
  • "The band appeared on Late Night with Conan O'Brien before" → "The Promise Ring appeared on Late Night with Conan O'Brien in May 2002, before"
  • "a US support slot followed" → "a US support slot for Jimmy Eat World followed"
  • "The Promise Ring appeared on the" → "The band performed for the"

=Background=

  • Retitle to Background and recording

==Writing and Bohlen's illness==

  • "third studio album, Very Emergency, in" → "third studio album Very Emergency in"
  • Wikilink record label
  • "Very Emergency expanded the band's" → "The album expanded the band's"
  • "worked on the" → "worked as part of the"
  • "tired of playing what" → "were tired of playing what"
  • "released the Electric Pink EP in" → "released their sixth EP Electric Pink in"
  • "Although the Promise Ring was then" → "Although the band were then"
  • "the tour now canceled," → "the tour having been canceled,"
  • "supported Bad Religion," → "supported Bad Religion on tour,"
  • "style to Nothing Feels Good (1997)." → "style to their second studio album Nothing Feels Good (1997) than Very Emergency."
  • "which forced the Promise Ring" → "that forced the Promise Ring"
  • "and unable to tour" → "and made them unable to tour"
  • Mention what year they couldn't tour for the rest of
  • "graphics company; Bohlen and" → "graphics company, while Bohlen and"
  • "The band brought" → "The Promise Ring brought"

==Pre-production and label change==

  • Target Milwaukee, Wisconsin to Milwaukee
  • "which differed in style" → "that differed in style"
  • "In May of that year," → "In May 2001,"
  • "jamming in rehearsal," → "jamming when rehearsing,"
  • "although initially writing material" → "although initially wrote material"
  • "they re-evaluated and" → "the Promise Ring re-evaluated and"
  • "with Jade Tree by March 2001," → "signed to Jade Tree by March 2001,"
  • "later in the year." → "later that year."
  • "They contacted the band's manager," → "The record label contacted the band's manager,"
  • Are you sure "cold" is the correct word here?
  • "with that label;" → "with the imprint;"
  • "The label was" → "Anti- was"
  • "wanted move away" → "wanted to move away"
  • "the band and label" → "the band and Jade Tree"
  • "less synonymous"," → "less synonymous,""
  • "from the Jade Tree sound." → "from the record label's sound."
  • "to license the band's releases" → "to license the Promise Ring's releases"
  • "to license the Electric Pink EP to Epitaph" → "to license Electric Pink to Epitaph"
  • "European release and to" → "European release, and to"
  • "the Promise Ring was becoming" → "the Promise Ring were becoming"

=Production=

  • "the sound they wanted." → "the sound they wanted to create."
  • "whom Street produced." → "whom Street had produced for."
  • "the band flew to" → "the Promise Ring flew to"
  • "They were in" → "The band were in"
  • "they decided to" → "the Promise Ring decided to"
  • Remove brackets around in the UK
  • "The song included" → "The song features"
  • "the remainder of the" → "the remained of Wood/Water{{'}}s"
  • "the band had toured with Camden earlier in the year." → "the Promise Ring had toured with Camden earlier in 2001."
  • "returned from vacation he said" → "returned from vacation, he said"
  • "where they played him the songs'" → "playing him the songs'"
  • "to the previous day's recordings." → "to the recordings from each previous day."
  • "assisted by Jon Olliffe." → "with assistance from Jon Olliffe."
  • "Street and the band ran" → "Street and the Promise Ring ran"
  • "on it turned out to be enjoyable." → "on the song turned out to be enjoyable for them."
  • "beginning in September" → "beginning in September 2001"
  • "The sessions total cost was" → "The total cost for the sessions was"
  • 200,000 → $200,000
  • "of the band's" → "of the Promise Ring's"
  • "at Jacobs except for" → "at Jacobs, except for"

=Composition and lyrics=

  • "the sound of Wood/Water has been described as" → "Wood/Water has been described as"
  • Target alternative pop to Alternative rock
  • "from their older emo sound," → "from their old emo sound,"
  • Wikilink acoustic guitars
  • Target folk to Folk music
  • "were also present." → "are also present."
  • "was reminiscent of the works by" → "was described as reminiscent of the music by"
  • "Wheat and the Delgados." → "Wheat, and the Delgados."
  • "Its title is from" → "The title of Wood/Water comes from"
  • "and its lyrics addressed" → "and lyrics on Wood/Water address"
  • "were related to touring, especially touring for" → "are related to touring, especially the tours for"
  • "which was compared to that in" → "that was compared to that on"
  • "garage rock-pop song evoked" → "garage rock-pop song evokes"
  • "keyboard ending recalled" → "keyboard ending recalls the sound of"
  • "set the lyrical tone for the rest of the album." → "sets the lyrical tone for the rest of Wood/Water."
  • "Street told the band to" → "During recording, Street told the Promise Ring to"
  • Target croquet mallets to Croquet
  • "showcasing Bohlen's storytelling" → "that showcases Bohlen's storytelling"
  • [36][33][43] should be put in numerical order
  • Wikilink synthesizers
  • "resembles the band's earlier material" → "resembles their earlier material"
  • [36][34][44] put in numerical order
  • Target chorus to Refrain
  • Wikilink drum machine
  • "as the band shifts" → "as the Promise Ring shifts"
  • "Reminiscent of 10cc, Bohlen wonders" → "The song is reminiscent of 10cc's style, with Bohlen wondering"
  • "which the band had" → "that the band had"
  • "despite listening to" → "despite listening to the Smiths' fourth studio album"
  • "an ambient country song which" → "an ambient country song, which"
  • "The folk rock "My Life Is at Home"" → "The folk rock track "My Life Is at Home""
  • Where do any of the sources mention comparisons to the Beach Boys and Weezer?

::I had accidentally copied the wrong URL; fixed with correct one that mentions the comparisons. Yeepsi (talk) 14:01, 22 October 2020 (UTC)

=Release=

  • Retitle to Release and promotion
  • "online on March 3." → "online on March 3 of that year."
  • "The band played a" → "The Promise Ring played a"
  • "on March 26 on a" → "on March 26, 2001 via a"
  • Target 10" vinyl to Phonograph record
  • "This version contains one bonus track," → "The version contains one bonus track," with the wikilink per MOS:LINK2SECT
  • "the band made two acoustic" → "the Promise Ring delivered two acoustic"
  • "in April and May, supported" → "in April and May of 2002, being supported"
  • "Arni + Kinski (formerly of GusGus)." → "former GusGus members Arni + Kinski."
  • "On May 24," → "On May 24 of that year,"
  • "released on May 27." → "released on May 27, 2002."
  • "released as a single on July 9;" → "released as the album's lead single on July 9 of that year;" with the wikilink
  • "of "Stop Playing Guitar" and" → "of "Stop Playing Guitar" alongside"
  • Target CD to Compact disc
  • "featured edit and album versions" does it feature multiple edits or just one? either change to "featured edits" or "featured an edit"
  • "The band again supported Jimmy Eat World for a" → "Jimmy Eat World were again supported by the Promise Ring for a"
  • "in late July and early August." → "in late July and early August of 2002."
  • "announced on October 14 that the band" → "announced on October 14, 2002 that they"

=Reception=

  • Retitle to Critical reception
  • "thoughtful musicality", and" → "thoughtful musicality," and"
  • "wrote that the" → "said of the album that the"
  • "disappeared", replaced by" → "disappeared", being replaced by"
  • "songs" which have" → "songs," which have"
  • "the album was a" → "the album is a"
  • "music critic Adrien Begrand called" → "critic Adrien Begrand called"
  • "hearing the band" → "hearing the Promise Ring"
  • "slower track", and" → "slower track," and"
  • "were a" → "are a"
  • "which saw the band" → "that sees the Promise Ring"
  • "made it sound more" → "make it sound more"
  • "the Promise Ring; it wasn't a" → "the Promise Ring; he said the album wasn't a"
  • Target hook to Hook (music)
  • "However, the album" → "However, he opined that the album"
  • ""admirable", "you" → ""admirable," DiCrescenzo explained that "you"
  • Wikilink Sizzler

=Track listing=

  • except "Say Goodbye Good" by → except "Say Goodbye Good", produced by

=Personnel=

  • Target Quincy McCrary to Quetzal (band)
  • Any specific order for the Production personnel?

::I put them in the order as they appear in the booklet. Yeepsi (talk) 14:01, 22 October 2020 (UTC)

=References=

  • [https://copyvios.toolforge.org/?lang=en&project=wikipedia&title=Wood%2FWater&oldid=&action=search&use_engine=1&use_links=1&turnitin=1 Copyvio score] looks good at 21.3%
  • Make sure all of these are archived by using the tool
  • WP:OVERLINK of Anti- on ref 17
  • Various publications calling the album pop: → Citations regarding publications calling the album pop: on ref 32
  • Cite Pitchfork as work instead for ref 34
  • WP:OVERLINK of The A.V. Club on ref 36
  • WP:OVERLINK of NME on ref 40
  • MOS:CAPS issues with ref 52; ANTI is the part with the issues here since it is not stylised like that, though MP3 is fine since it is supposed to be in that style of capitalisation
  • Fix MOS:QWQ issues with refs 55 and 61
  • Wikilink CMJ New Music Monthly under sources per MOS:LINK2SECT

=Final comments and verdict=

  • {{onhold}} though do not feel afraid to reach out if you are somewhat confused about any of the requested changes; let's hope your response speed is on track with the previous rate though. --K. Peake 12:30, 22 October 2020 (UTC)

::Done. Yeepsi (talk) 14:01, 22 October 2020 (UTC)

:::{{u|Yeepsi}} I did some brief copyediting where issues still needed fixing; a word of advice for next time would be to look through the requested changes yourself and double check that you have done them all before claiming to be done. {{Pass}} time has come now though, good job! --K. Peake 17:45, 22 October 2020 (UTC)