Gray asexuality

Gray asexuality is considered the gray area between asexuality and allosexuality, in which a person may experience sexual attraction in variety of "unconventional" ways.

• A graysexual alloromantic person: rarely sexually attracted to others.
• An asexual grayromantic person: not sexually attracted to anyone, but does experience being romantically attracted to others on rare occasions.
• A gray-pansexual aromantic person: rarely attracted to people sexually of all genders, but never romantically attracted to anyone.
• A gynesexual gray-biromantic person: usually sexually attracted to women or feminine-presenting people; rarely experiences romantic attraction towards more than one gender.

Aspec is a term which can be used to mean that one is on the asexual spectrum or aromantic spectrum.{{Cite web |date=2018-06-25 |title=Explore the spectrum: Guide to finding your ace community |url=https://www.glaad.org/amp/ace-guide-finding-your-community |access-date=2022-04-20 |website=GLAAD |language=en |archive-date=August 1, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20200801045947/https://www.glaad.org/amp/ace-guide-finding-your-community |url-status=dead }}{{Cite web |title=Understanding Asexuality |url=https://www.thetrevorproject.org/resources/article/understanding-asexuality/ |access-date=2022-04-20 |website=The Trevor Project |language=en-US}}

{{Main|Demisexuality}}

The term demisexuality was coined in 2006 by Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN). The prefix demi- derives from the Vulgar Latin {{Lang|la|*dimedius}}, which comes from Latin {{Lang|la|dimidius}}, meaning "divided into two equal parts, halved."{{Cite web |title=Definition of DEMISEXUAL |url=https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/demisexual |access-date=2022-10-14 |website=www.merriam-webster.com |language=en}}{{Cite web |title=Definition of DEMI- |url=https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/demi- |access-date=2022-10-14 |website=www.merriam-webster.com |language=en}}{{Cite web |title=Charlton T. Lewis, Charles Short, A Latin Dictionary, dī-mĭdĭus |url=https://www.perseus.tufts.edu/hopper/text?doc=Perseus:text:1999.04.0059:entry=dimidius |access-date=2022-10-14 |website=www.perseus.tufts.edu}}

A demisexual person does not experience sexual attraction until they have formed a strong emotional connection with a prospective partner. The definition of "emotional bond" varies from person to person in as much as the elements of the split attraction model can vary.{{Cite web|url=https://www.gsrc.princeton.edu/split-attraction|title=Split Attraction Model|website=Princeton Gender + Sexuality Resource Center|access-date=November 3, 2021|archive-date=November 3, 2021|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20211103095834/https://www.gsrc.princeton.edu/split-attraction|url-status=live}}{{Cite web|url=https://www.bustle.com/articles/155277-what-does-demisexual-mean-here-are-6-signs-that-you-may-identify-as-demisexual|title=Bustle|website=www.bustle.com|access-date=2016-12-16|archive-date=April 21, 2016|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20160421101929/https://www.bustle.com/articles/155277-what-does-demisexual-mean-here-are-6-signs-that-you-may-identify-as-demisexual|url-status=live}} Demisexuals can have any romantic orientation.{{Cite news|url=http://helloflo.com/mean-demisexual-demiromantic/|title=What Does It Mean To Be Demisexual And Demiromantic? - HelloFlo|date=2016-06-02|newspaper=HelloFlo|language=en-US|access-date=2016-12-16|archive-date=December 20, 2016|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20161220183142/http://helloflo.com/mean-demisexual-demiromantic/|url-status=live}}{{Cite web|url=https://lgbtq.unc.edu/resources/exploring-identities/asexuality-attraction-and-romantic-orientation|title=Asexuality, Attraction, and Romantic Orientation|access-date=July 23, 2020|work=The LGBTQ Center at The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill|archive-date=November 19, 2019|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20191119213638/https://lgbtq.unc.edu/resources/exploring-identities/asexuality-attraction-and-romantic-orientation|url-status=live}} People in the asexual spectrum communities often switch labels throughout their lives, and fluidity in orientation and identity is a common attitude.

Demisexuality, as a component of the asexuality spectrum, is included in queer activist communities such as GLAAD and The Trevor Project, and itself has finer divisions.{{Cite web |last=Pasquier |first=Morgan |date=2018-10-18 |title=Explore the spectrum: Guide to finding your ace community |url=https://www.glaad.org/amp/ace-guide-finding-your-community |archive-date=August 1, 2020 |website=glaad.org |access-date=July 22, 2020 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20200801045947/https://www.glaad.org/amp/ace-guide-finding-your-community |url-status=live }}{{Cite web|url=https://www.thetrevorproject.org/trvr_support_center/asexual/|title=Asexual|access-date=July 22, 2020|archive-date=April 6, 2021|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20210406125426/https://www.thetrevorproject.org/trvr_support_center/asexual/|url-status=live}}

Demisexuality is a common theme (or trope) in romantic novels that has been termed 'compulsory demisexuality'.McAlister, Jodi. "First Love, Last Love, True Love: Heroines, Heroes, and the Gendered Representation of Love in the Category Romance Novel." Gender & Love, 3rd Global Conference. Mansfield College, Oxford, UK. Vol. 15. 2013 Within fictitious prose, the paradigm of sex being only truly pleasurable when the partners are in love is a trait stereotypically more commonly associated with female characters. The intimacy of the connection also allows for an exclusivity to take place.{{cite journal|title='That complete fusion of spirit as well as body': Heroines, heroes, desire and compulsory demisexuality in the Harlequin Mills & Boon romance novel|first=Jodi|last=McAlister|date=1 September 2014|journal=Australasian Journal of Popular Culture|volume=3|issue=3|pages=299–310|doi=10.1386/ajpc.3.3.299_1}}

Post-doctorate research on the subject has been done since at least 2013, and podcasts and social media have also raised public awareness of the sexual orientation.{{Cite web|url=https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20211101-why-demisexuality-is-as-real-as-any-sexual-orientation|title=Why demisexuality is as real as any sexual orientation|first=Jessica|last=Klein|publisher=BBC|date=November 5, 2021|access-date=November 6, 2021|archive-date=November 6, 2021|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20211106150758/https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20211101-why-demisexuality-is-as-real-as-any-sexual-orientation|url-status=live}} Some public figures, such as Michaela Kennedy-Cuomo, who have come out as demisexual have also raised awareness, though they typically face some degree of ridicule for their sexuality.{{Cite web|url=https://www.insider.com/andrew-cuomo-daughter-says-she-is-demisexual-what-that-means-2021-7|title=Andrew Cuomo's daughter says she's demisexual. Here's what that means.|first=Canela|last=López|website=Insider|access-date=November 6, 2021|archive-date=March 9, 2022|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20220309223420/https://www.insider.com/andrew-cuomo-daughter-says-she-is-demisexual-what-that-means-2021-7|url-status=live}} The word gained entry to the Oxford English Dictionary in March 2022, with its earliest usage (as a noun) dating to 2006.{{cite web | url=https://public.oed.com/blog/the-oed-march-2022-update/ | title=Content warning: May contain notes on the OED March 2022 update | date=March 15, 2022 }}

{{Main|Fictosexuality}}

Fictosexuality refers to the sexual attraction towards fictional characters, encompassing those who lack attraction to real individuals and fall within the spectrum of gray asexuality.{{Cite journal |last1=Yule |first1=Morag A. |last2=Brotto |first2=Lori A. |last3=Gorzalka |first3=Boris B. |year=2017 |title=Sexual Fantasy and Masturbation Among Asexual Individuals: An In-Depth Exploration |url=https://med-fom-brotto.sites.olt.ubc.ca/files/2014/11/Yule-Gorzalka-Brotto-2017-Sexual-fantasy-masturbation-among-asexual-individuals-An-in-depth-exploration-4754.pdf |journal=Archives of Sexual Behavior |volume=47 |pages=311–328 |doi=10.1007/s10508-016-0870-8|pmid=27882477 |s2cid=254264133 }}{{Cite journal |last1=Karhulahti |first1=Veli-Matti |last2=Välisalo |first2=Tanja |year=2021 |title=Fictosexuality, Fictoromance, and Fictophilia: A Qualitative Study of Love and Desire for Fictional Characters |journal=Frontiers in Psychology |volume=11 |page=575427 |doi=10.3389/fpsyg.2020.575427 |pmid=33510665 |pmc=7835123 |doi-access=free }} These individuals can be found within online asexual communities. In recent times, certain fictosexuals have actively participated in queer activism.{{cn|date=March 2025}}

{{Gallery

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|File:Grey asexuality flag.svg

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|The graysexual pride flag, in which the gradations of gray represent intermediate sexuality{{Cite web|last=emarcyk|date=March 29, 2017|title=Word of the Week: Gray-A|url=https://www.glbtrt.ala.org/news/archives/2848|access-date=July 16, 2021|website=Rainbow Round Table News|language=en-US|archive-date=July 16, 2021|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20210716204009/https://www.glbtrt.ala.org/news/archives/2848|url-status=live}}

|File:Demisexual Pride Flag.svg

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|The demisexual flag, in which the black chevron represents asexuality, gray represents gray asexuality and demisexuality, white represents sexuality, and purple represents community.{{Cite web |url=https://www.entitymag.com/demisexual-flag-meaning/ |title=What the Demisexual Flag Really Represents A more specific, symbolic and subtle flag to wave at your pride events. |last=Ender |first=Elena |date=2017-06-21 |website=Entity |access-date=2019-12-22 |archive-date=December 3, 2017 |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20171203141319/https://www.entitymag.com/demisexual-flag-meaning/ |url-status=live }}

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Online communities, such as the Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN), as well as blogging websites such as Tumblr, have provided ways for gray-As to find acceptance in their communities. While gray-As are noted to have variety in the experiences of sexual attraction, individuals in the community share their identification within the spectrum.{{Cite book|url=https://books.google.com/books?id=XbgTAwAAQBAJ|title=Asexualities: Feminist and Queer Perspectives|last1=Cerankowski|first1=Karli June|last2=Milks|first2=Megan|date=2014-03-14|publisher=Routledge|isbn=978-1-134-69253-8|language=en|access-date=July 20, 2021|archive-date=July 26, 2020|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20200726101807/https://books.google.com/books?id=XbgTAwAAQBAJ|url-status=live}}

In society, there is a lack of understanding of who asexuals are. They often limit their interactions to an online platform. Asexuals have also found it safer to communicate through the use of symbols and slang. Asexuals are often referred to as aces. People are often under the misconception that asexuals hate sex or never have sex. For them, sex is not a focal point. This is where the term gray-asexual comes in.

A black, gray, white, and purple flag is commonly used to display pride in the asexual community. The gray bar represents the area of gray sexuality within the community,{{cite news|last=Williams|first=Isabel|url=http://www.campuspride.org/resources/introduction-to-asexual-identities-resource-guide/|title=Introduction to Asexual Identities & Resource Guide|newspaper=Campus Pride|access-date=March 5, 2015|url-status=dead |archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20150826084407/http://www.campuspride.org/resources/introduction-to-asexual-identities-resource-guide/|archive-date=August 26, 2015}} and the flag is also used by those who identify as gray-asexual:{{Cite web |title=Pride Flags |url=https://www.unco.edu/gender-sexuality-resource-center/resources/pride-flags.aspx |access-date=2022-03-31 |website=The Gender and Sexuality Resource Center |language=en}}{{better source needed|date=April 2022}}

• The black stripe represents asexuality as a whole.
• The gray stripe is for asexuals who fall anywhere within the asexual spectrum, including gray-asexual and demi-sexual identities.
• The white stripe represents allies of asexuality, including the non-asexual partners of some asexual people.
• The purple represents the asexual community.

A 2019 survey by The Ace Community Survey reported that 10.9% asexuals identified as gray-sexual and 9% identified as demisexual,{{Cite web|date=24 Oct 2021|title=2019 Asexual Community Survey Summary Report|url=https://asexualcensus.files.wordpress.com/2021/10/2019-asexual-community-survey-summary-report.pdf|url-status=live|access-date=22 Feb 2022|website=The Ace Community Survey|archive-date=January 20, 2022|archive-url=https://web.archive.org/web/20220120131212/https://asexualcensus.files.wordpress.com/2021/10/2019-asexual-community-survey-summary-report.pdf}} though asexuality in general is relatively new to academic research and public discourse.

{{Reflist}}

• {{Cite book |last1=Bogaert |first1=Anthony F. |year=2012 |title=Understanding Asexuality |url=https://books.google.com/books?id=O3v27O00GEY |publisher=Rowman & Littlefield PublishersC |isbn=978-1-4422-0099-9 |access-date=March 4, 2015}}
• {{Cite book |last1=Cerankowski |first1=Karli June |last2=Milks |first2=Megan |year=2014 |title=Asexualities: Feminist and Queer Perspectives |url=https://books.google.com/books?id=zLgTAwAAQBAJ |publisher=Routledge |isbn=978-0-415-71442-6 |access-date=March 4, 2015}}
• {{Cite book |last1=Weinberg |first1=Thomas S. |last2=Newmahr |first2=Staci D. |year=2015 |title=Selves, Symbols, and Sexualities: An Interactionist Anthology |url=https://books.google.com/books?id=8UwXBAAAQBAJ |publisher=SAGE Publications |isbn=978-1-4522-7665-6 |access-date=March 4, 2015}}

• [http://www.asexuality.org/ The Asexual Visibility & Education Network]
• [http://www.demisexuality.org/ Demisexuality Resource Center]

{{Asexuality topics}}

{{Gender and sexual identities}}

{{Human sexuality and sexology}}

{{Human sexuality}}

{{LGBTQ}}

Category:Asexuality

Category:Sexual attraction