Talk:Chris Creighton/GA1

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{{al|{{#titleparts:Chris Creighton/GA1|-1}}|noname=yes}}
:This review is transcluded from Talk:Chris Creighton/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: HickoryOughtShirt?4 (talk · contribs) 22:16, 19 October 2020 (UTC)

:GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)

1. It is reasonably well written.
2. :a (prose, spelling, and grammar): {{GAList/check|y}} b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists): {{GAList/check|y}}
3. ::
4. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
5. :a (reference section): {{GAList/check|y}} b (citations to reliable sources): {{GAList/check|y}} c (OR): {{GAList/check|y}} d (copyvio and plagiarism): {{GAList/check|y}}
6. ::
7. It is broad in its coverage.
8. :a (major aspects): {{GAList/check|y}} b (focused): {{GAList/check|y}}
9. ::
10. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
11. :Fair representation without bias: {{GAList/check|y}}
12. ::
13. It is stable.
14. :No edit wars, etc.: {{GAList/check|y}}
15. ::
16. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
17. :a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): {{GAList/check|y}} b (appropriate use with suitable captions): {{GAList/check|y}}
18. ::
19. Overall: Pass
20. :Pass/Fail: {{GAList/check|y}}
21. ::

• Is there a reference for his DOB?
• Added. Mackensen (talk) 22:45, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
• Can 2014 season be linked?
• Done. Mackensen (talk) 22:45, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
• {{tq|Creighton served}} please add {{tq|formally}}
• Please Wikilink Kenyon College
• Done. Mackensen (talk) 22:45, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
• {{tq|As the head coach at Wabash in early 2000s}}, needs a comma
• Done. Mackensen (talk) 22:45, 19 October 2020 (UTC)

• Here would be a good place to reference his DOB
• Fixed. Mackensen (talk) 22:45, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
• Reference #2 doesn't say his family moved to Seattle
• It's a reasonable inference, given that his early life was in San Francisco but that he played high school football in Seattle. Mackensen (talk) 22:45, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
• {{tq|In 1989 Kenyon won a share of the North Coast Athletic Conference (NCAC) title, Kenyon's first and As of 2020 only conference championship.}} Why is {{tq|As of}} capitalized?
• Template parameter fail. It's fixed now. Mackensen (talk) 21:45, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
• Please put commas after stating the year
• Fixed, I think. Mackensen (talk) 21:45, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
• Assuming Jake Knott is this Jake Knott please Wikilink his name
• Different person. Mackensen (talk) 22:45, 19 October 2020 (UTC)
• Should athletic hall of fame be capitalised?
• Maybe? It appears the proper name is "Kenyon Athletic Hall of Fame" (see [https://athletics.kenyon.edu/honors/hall-of-fame]), so I think in the current usage it wouldn't be capitalized. Mackensen (talk) 21:45, 22 October 2020 (UTC)

• Is there any more information on Concordia? (which I at first assumed was Concordia University lol).
• Probably not. Coordinators don't get much coverage at that level. I can take another look. Mackensen (talk) 21:40, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
• I think it is interesting he was hired via phone without being seen (per ref 8) especially for the time period. Could this be added in?
• Added. Mackensen (talk) 21:40, 22 October 2020 (UTC)

• Seeing as he spent four years here, could this not be expanded a bit more?
• See above regarding Concordia. I've actually visited Manchester's campus; it's pretty but it's small and not near much of anything. I'll look again. Mackensen (talk) 21:41, 22 October 2020 (UTC)

• Please include the website for reference #16
• Fixed. Mackensen (talk) 21:41, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
• {{tq|In 2002}} add a comma
• Fixed. Mackensen (talk) 21:41, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
• {{tq|won their first NCAC title, finished undefeated for the first time since 1982, and made the playoffs for the first time since 1977}} does this have to be in quotes? Is there not another way to reword this?
• Reworded. Mackensen (talk) 21:41, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
• {{tq|He was also be named}} - do you mean {{tq|would also be}}?
• Yes. Sigh. Mackensen (talk) 21:41, 22 October 2020 (UTC)

• Reference #13 doesn't support {{tq|On December 22, 2007, Creighton was named the head football coach...}}
• Added a reference. Mackensen (talk) 21:41, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
• {{tq|Under Creighton}} add a comma
• Fixed. Mackensen (talk) 21:41, 22 October 2020 (UTC)

• {{tq|English had gone 11–46 over the past five seasons. In his first two seasons, Creighton won only three games}} can these be combined into one sentence such as {{tq|English had gone 11–46 over the past five seasons and Creighton won only three games in his first two seasons.}}
• Joined with a semicolon. I think it works. Mackensen (talk) 21:42, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
• {{tq|In 2016}} add a comma
• Fixed. Mackensen (talk) 21:42, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
• {{tq|Following the 2018 season}} add a comma
• Fixed. Mackensen (talk) 21:42, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
• {{tq|In 2019}} add a comma
• Fixed. Mackensen (talk) 21:42, 22 October 2020 (UTC)
• Please define OC since it is being used for the first time
• Added above. Mackensen (talk) 21:42, 22 October 2020 (UTC)

: {{U|Mackensen}}, thanks for the quick fixes. Just ping me when done. HickoryOughtShirt?4 (talk) 21:46, 22 October 2020 (UTC)

:: * {{ping|HickoryOughtShirt?4}} you're welcome and thank you for undertaking the review. I've addressed all the copyediting stuff, but let me take a few hours to see if I can dig anything further up on Concordia and Manchester. Mackensen (talk) 21:47, 22 October 2020 (UTC)

:: * {{ping|HickoryOughtShirt?4}} back to you. Mackensen (talk) 00:24, 23 October 2020 (UTC)

::: {{U|Mackensen}}, I got sick of the US Debate and decided to check into Wikipedia. I am happy witht the changes and am passing this article. Congrats! HickoryOughtShirt?4 (talk) 02:11, 23 October 2020 (UTC)

::::{{u|HickoryOughtShirt?4}}, a wise choice I think. Appropriately, I'm watching Arkansas State play Appalachian State. Thank you again for undertaking the review and for your helpful suggestions. Best, Mackensen (talk) 02:20, 23 October 2020 (UTC)